Author: Heather Davis

Hating Ambivalence: Psalm 119:113-120

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Psalms 119:113-120

I hate the double-minded, but I love your law. . .  Psalm 119:113

 

If you are anything like me, you may wonder a bit each time you recite the first portion of this week’s passage: “I hate the double-minded…”  What about hating the sin but loving the sinner?  I have given this a lot of thought.

Two things come readily to mind. First and foremost, David was human, and the Psalms express a wide range of human emotions, honest and heartfelt but not always Godly. As we know, the underlying current of this whole psalm is passionate love for the Scriptures and for God Himself.

I cannot know, of course, but I think that these words are intended not so much as a judgment call on double-minded men but rather an expression of how zealous the psalmist is for undivided loyalty to his God.

Secondly, I cannot help but see the human tendency to generalize in David’s words. We all do it here or there because frankly, it is easier. For example, I’m sure many of the world’s people back in the late 1930s and early 1940s could have said just as broadly, “I hate Nazis,” when what they actually detested was more precisely the practices of the National Socialist Party: the persecution, oppression, violence, and disregard for human life.

I tend to believe David’s expression of hatred for “the double-minded” is similar. He probably does not actually despise men who are ambivalent, for certainly that would include his own sweet self at times. It is most likely the practice of double-mindedness that he deplores.

And for good reason. The idea behind the double-mindedness that seems to be conveyed here is a playing of both sides of the field; not necessarily of agonized indecision but of the refusal to make a decision, like a person who will not take sides in a conflict or sporting event until they are sure they can choose the winning side.

James, too, sharply rebukes this tendency of divided interests or instability in his epistle, even admonishing such people to “purify your hearts, you double-minded,” (see James 4:8, also James 1:7-8).  Double-mindedness is abhorrent, though like all crimes against the Almighty, I firmly believe we must loathe it most in ourselves.

However, I do not wholesale buy into the current propaganda that says if I disagree with the actions of another, I am hateful or judgmental.  By that logic, Hitler would have been as much in the right as those he persecuted! No, I can recognize sin in others without condemning them. It is part of our calling — to admonish each other, or as Hebrews 3:13 puts it, “to exhort one another… so that none… may be hardened by the deceitfulness of sin.”

Jesus,  in the same discourse where He warned us not to judge lest we be judged, also taught that we can recognize false teachers by their fruit (see Matthew 7). We are not to judge, but neither are we to be blind to sin in the world around us. Admittedly, this is a tricky path to tread; narrow enough that a false step will find us walking not on the path to life, but near it.

This is why we so need the lamp of God’s word to shine in our lives and our own hearts, illuminating the dark and secret areas of our own iniquitous thoughts so that they may be cast out and destroyed. For this very reason, it is vital to cultivate our personal relationship with the Most High, spending time in His Word and learning to hear and respond to the voice of the Holy Spirit as He now restrains our tongues from self-righteousness, now prompts us to speak in God-exalting boldness.

Now more than ever, we need the holy fear of God that David recorded at the end of this stanza so many years ago.

You are my hiding place and my shield, I hope in Your word… My flesh trembles for fear of You, and I am afraid of Your judgments. Psalm 119:114, 120

A holy reverence for God, a true and honest fear of the Almighty, brings with it a loathing of sin — all sin. If we could say, like David, “My flesh trembles for fear of you,” we would also detest any traces of duplicity or unbelief wherever they may occur simply because they dishonor our King and because they serve as a blockade between Him and the people He came to save.

But there is good news, because in Christ we have hope. By His sacrifice, we are forgiven and do not have to fear His judgments, though I believe that even in Christ, we would do well to be mindful of them! We can make Jesus our shield against the evil without and against the evil within, hiding even our footsteps in His as we follow carefully in His steps down the narrow path. And we can tell others the good news that, while we all are guilty of ambivalence, the sacrifice of the Lamb of God is enough to redeem us from it!

Oh, our God and Sovereign! Please forgive both us and our nation for our disrespect and for haughtiness before You. Teach our hearts to fear and love You as we ought, for we know that the fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom. Teach us to hate ambivalence and to flee from it; forgive our unbelief and help us to overcome it. 

 

 

A Lamp to My Feet: Psalm 119:105-112

~ Heather Davis ~ 1 Comment

Psalms 119:105-112

Your word is a lamp to my feet and a light to my path. . .

Ah, here we are — a verse from my childhood. I memorized Psalm 119:105 when I was small, though at the time the words were merely poetry to me. How I often wish I could go back and talk to my childish self! I would love to tell her that there is more to this verse than just pretty lyrical imagery. What a labyrinth of murky and confusing paths I might have saved myself if only I had taken the words literally.

At my present season of life, I find great comfort in knowing that I have a Lantern at hand to light the way. All too often in my journey, I find myself in a place where the path ahead branches and  both ways are dark and uncertain, disappearing into the blackness no matter how hard I try to discern the direction each takes.

It is at moments like these, of course, that I need the Word to light my path. However, I have found that just as it is not handy to have a lantern without fuel, wick, or understanding of how to operate it, neither is it particularly useful to have a Bible without some basic understanding of the need to do what it says. Doubtlessly, this is why the psalmist follows with “I have sworn an oath and confirmed it, to keep Your righteous rules.”

I must be honest, however. Sometimes I do stray from His precepts.  Always when I find myself in a state of confusion or turmoil, it is not because God’s word is unclear; it is because I have allowed my sin nature to take over. Doubt has crept in and distracted me momentarily. But when I finally direct my gaze back to the path from which I wandered, I find my Lamp shining just as brightly as ever, illuminating the way I need to go. It is up to me to walk in His ways.

Before I close, I want to express how much I love this image of the Word as a lamp, especially as I consider that the Lord is, Himself, the Light of the World. So many images from throughout the Scriptures coalesce here. I hope to explore this more in depth sometime soon, but for now, allow me to finish by considering just two of them:

In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God.
John 1:1

And the city has no need of sun or moon to shine on it, for the glory of God gives it light, and its lamp is the Lamb.
Revelation 21:23

Dear ones, I urge us all to look to the written word that we may know the Living Word. For us, too, may His testimonies become the joy of our hearts as we incline our hearts to perform His statutes forever, to the end. Though the world around us may darken and fall to gloom, let us, Believers, walk always in the Light.

 

 

I

Overwhelmed

~ Heather Davis ~ 1 Comment

And Jacob said, “O God of my father Abraham and God of my father Isaac, O LORD who said to me, ‘Return to your country and to your kindred, that I may do you good,’ I am not worthy of the least of all the deeds of steadfast love and all the faithfulness that you have shown to your servant, for with only my staff I crossed this Jordan, and now I have become two camps.
Genesis 32:9-10

Reading through the Old Testament as a new Christian, I remember being overwhelmed by sheer frequency of  slaughter documented in its pages. I knew then that God is good and that His purposes are just, but in those early years I really struggled with the annihilation of peoples and nations that are recounted in the Book.

In more recent years, God has brought me to an even more acute understanding of my sin and His sovereignty than ever before — and that’s saying quite a lot. I can see, quite painfully, how sin still taints my choices, my thoughts, even my understanding of God’s will and my service to Him.  Perhaps because of this or for some other reason, now when I read through the Old Testament it isn’t the wrath of God that is overwhelming; it is His mercy.

As I consider the ancient accounts of deceit and trickery, of faithlessness and arrogance, of unabashed defiance against the Creator, of murder, rape, and incest, I find myself wondering why He would choose to have mercy on any nation or on any single person at all. To be honest, it astonishes me that He did not simply scrap the whole business of humanity entirely and move on.

Reading of the spiritual failures and successes of the forefathers of the faith, I see echoes of my own, wandering heart. I, too, have been pompous and full of pride. At one time in my life, I openly defied the very One who breathed life into me, refusing to believe He even existed.  The life I had before I met my Savior was one of immorality that frankly disgusts me now. If I were my own Creator, I do not think I could have mustered any mercy for one who offered so little to love as I did.

And yet, He did have mercy on me. Though, like Jacob, I did not acknowledge Him in my early years; though, like Abraham, I sometimes act in faith and sometimes in fear; though I try to “help” Him accomplish His promises as Abraham and Sarah did; though I have wrestled with Him until I have nothing left but to cling to Him, He had had mercy and spared me the wrath I deserve. More wondrous yet, He also repaid all my unbelief and stubbornness with grace, bringing me to know His Son, Jesus, whose obedience and sacrifice has paid in full the tremendous debt of my sin and offered me eternal life.

In His grace, as with Joseph, all the pain and hardship I have suffered, God has used for His good purposes. Because of this, I know that present and future suffering will be used for His glory just the same. This sure knowledge gives me comfort and hope when afflictions loom.

Oh, how I love my Lord and His word! I delight in my days with Him –communing in prayer and by reading His word and meditating on it –simply because I am overwhelmed by His steadfast love and faithfulness!

Similarities: Psalm 119:97-104

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Psalms 119:97-104

Oh how I love your law! It is my meditation all the day…

If you are hanging in there, we are past the half-way mark now. I don’t know about you, but I am finding that sometimes all the “precepts” and “rules” and “commandments” and “statutes” are getting mixed up in my mind. It’s OK — keep pressing on and we will all get it sorted eventually.  The main thing is to meditate on adoration of the Word and by doing so, draw closer to the Lord who gave it to us.

As I think about all the synonyms that frequently trip me up in my memory work, I am reminded that similarity does not always equal monotony. When I was young (and not a disciple of Jesus), my criteria for what I considered  beautiful was narrow. I only saw beauty in a very few human faces. Now that I am older, I see some marks of beauty in all faces; some faint shadow of their Maker’s image, perhaps. In fact, the human face fascinates me.

Aside from tremendous deformity-causing birth defects, all faces are remarkably similar, sharing roughly the same shape and features. Still, within this relative uniformity, there is an astonishing amount of variety.  Granted some arrangements are more appealing than others, but when one takes the time to really look, there is plenty to enjoy.

Old, young, black, brown, white, well-fleshed or rail-thin, freckled, dimpled, or creased — there are so many individuals, so many stories represented, so many trials and joys engraved in each line and stamped in each furrow, and all of them packaged in the same basic format. There is so much beauty and tragedy in the lives of individuals represented on their faces that my heart swells just to think of it.

I see Psalm 119 like this, too. There are many of the same words used, many of the same concepts expressed, some in roughly the same phrases.  In English, some stanzas flow very naturally while in others I am very aware that not all elements of poetry survive translation.

Still, there is a beauty to the psalmist’s outpouring of love for the written word of God.  Each similarity we encounter is not sameness, but a different facet of the same elegant gem.  In each stanza, no matter how clunky it may initially sound, there is a glimmer of something wonderful — the pure and simple adoration of the Creator by one of His children.

O Lord, teach us to truly love Your law! As we continue to memorize and meditate on this psalm, help us to move beyond loving only those portions that are encouraging and bright to loving the parts that cause us to squirm under conviction and bring the sting of contrition.  

May it be that our meditation on Your law brings us the wisdom we need to live as “children of God without blemish in the midst of a crooked and perverse generation.” (Philippians 2:15)

Yours: Psalm 119:89-96

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Psalms 119:89-96

I will never forget your precepts, for by them you have given me life. I am yours; save me…

This may be one of my favorite stanzas so far. We have commiserated with the psalmist through trials and as he teetered on the edge of despair. Now, it seems, he is once again able to praise our magnificent God.  He seems to  comfort himself by the absolute unchangeable nature of God, finding solace in the reminder of the Almighty’s sovereignty.

However, the persecution or trouble is not ended, for he writes, “The wicked lie in wait to destroy  me…”  It is not an end to his problems that prompted this outburst of praise, then. So what has changed?

If David was anything like me,  the only change was probably one of perspective. While I have never endured the sort of trials David did — fleeing through the wilderness while being pursued by a murderous king or being chased out of my kingdom by my own vengeful offspring — I have had times of both physical and spiritual torment. I have felt very, very alone and wondered if my God would ever rescue me.

At such times, my faith is sorely tested and I cling to a knowing that He is good much as a shipwrecked man must cling to some bit of wreckage in order to stay afloat in the raging sea.

It is tempting in these dark moments to think God doesn’t hear, doesn’t care… but much like David, I remember that His word really is firmly fixed in the heavens; His faithfulness truly does endure to all generations. He is the supreme being, the only One who can cause the earth to continue, or with a word, to cease to exist.

It is for this reason that His law is and must be my delight, for without it, how could I stand? On those bleak and dreary days of adversity, I find it most helpful to turn my thoughts away from myself to the goodness of my God.

It is for this reason that I am working on adding this psalm to the other verses, passages, and chapters of Scripture already tucked into my memory. I not only never want to forget His precepts, I want to know them as well as I know the lines of my own hands.

Sometimes in the darkness words of devotion fail me utterly. At such times I find I can whisper those precious praises contained in the Scriptures. Reciting the adoring words written by others or remembering the promises of God lovingly tucked into His word — even recalling the rightness of my Father’s loving chastisement — these things called up from memory breathe new life into my faith when it falters.

Even now in the midst of a continuing physical trial, I cry out to my Maker, “I am Yours; save me!” And I know He will.

My God, save me from my tendency to doubt, save me from the wicked in this world, save me from the wickedness within my own heart. You have saved me once and for all with the blood of my Lord Jesus; continue to save me daily lest I forget You and drift away. Save me from my indolence and my faithlessness. Save me from my own, wrong motives. I am entirely Yours. Save me and do with me as You will.

Endurance: Psalms 119:81-88

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Psalms 119:81-88

How long must your servant endure?

The psalmist has penned much concerning affliction in the last few stanzas. In this one it seems that he is nearing the end of himself. I do not know what was going on in the life of our author when he wrote these words, but I am sure any who have followed the Way for very long at all can understand the sentiment behind them.

These are words written during those times when faith is proved genuine, those times when there is nothing left but faith.

The circumstances have been unfavorable for long enough that even the memory of them has no sustaining power. The believer finds himself alone, surrounded by indifferent strangers at the best of times, malicious enemies at the worst.  All comfort has gone.

Perhaps, like Job, even family and health have been removed, or perhaps it is merely an internal period of stifling darkness that St. John of the Cross spoke of as “The Dark Night of the Soul.”

Whatever the cause, the believer fits the description in Isaiah 54:11, “O afflicted one, storm-tossed and not comforted…”  There is nothing tangible to cling to, nothing visible to offer comfort.

But there is faith.

It is here in these dark and tormented valleys that the believer’s faith is tried and found secure because it is not rooted in ephemeral assets such as vitality, prosperity, or the warm comfort of loved ones. This is where the foundation of faith is exposed to the brutal elements, yet it endures because it is heavily entrenched in the Eternal God, the unchanging Rock.

Here, the footsore and weary believer may plead to see the promises of God with his own eyes, believing that even if this dark night lasts for all the years allotted to him in this body, he will someday see the fulfillment of the eternal promise in Christ.

Yes, weeping may last for a terribly long night, but take courage, Believer. Joy will come  at last on the morning of the great Day of the Lord… if it does not come before.

Oh, Lord, for those who are enduring times of crushing pain or persecution, let Your joy come to them soon!

His Hands: Psalm 119:73-80

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Psalms 119:73-80

“Your hands have made and fashioned me…”

These mighty hands that flung the stars into place, that gathered seas and formed land,  that formed the mighty elephant and the delicate butterfly also have made an d fashioned you and me. Isn’t it incredible?

The opening verse of this stanza also calls to mind Psalm 139:13-14:

For you formed my inward parts; you knitted me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Wonderful are your works; my soul knows it very well.

To think that the same wonderful hands that created us will also be there to guide our steps with firmness or gentleness as needed is comforting to me. The Mighty God who  formed me has not left me alone to figure things out on my own, but He Himself will provide the understanding that I need to walk in a manner pleasing to Him. He is neither remote nor uncaring. Instead,  He is as actively involved in shaping me now as He was on that day His skillful hands first formed me.

I need reminders like these from time to time, for there are seasons when God does seem to be far off or aloof. Yet, like the Psalmist, I have that unshakable knowledge that His rules are righteous. When I am afflicted by His silence, it is in faithfulness that He afflicts me — and far too often the silence is a result of me wandering from His side and not the other way round.

That His steadfast love will always be there to comfort me when I return is a promise I treasure intensely.  It is because of His love and mercy that I can delight in His laws; it is because He is good that I know His rules and ways are good.

These are promises that are sure and steadfast, more certain than the sunrise and longer lasting than the very rocks of this world.  May it be said of all of us that those who fear our God will rejoice along with us. May it be that we, too, seek to be blameless in His statutes and to share His testimonies with all the listening world.

There is great joy to be had in the Living Word. Let us start the new year right by meditating on His wonderful precepts and rejoicing together in His promises!

Affliction: Psalm 119:65-72

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Psalms 119:65-72

“You have dealt well with Your servant, O Lord…”

I can honestly say that the Lord has dealt well with me. When it comes down to it, I am often shocked that He has dealt with me at all.  My Creator would be well within reason had He chosen to annihilate me for the rebellion of my youth, yet He patiently waited for me, watching as my youthful fury burned itself out in futility until the time came when I realized that all the worldly wisdom I had embraced was empty, that a life lived for myself by my own invented principles was meaningless.

I was afflicted, both by the choices of others when I was small and by my own decisions as a young adult. Acting in what I believed was freedom, I found myself chained more securely by my choices than I would have been by the God I rejected. He found me there, in utter darkness of soul and thoroughly disillusioned, and He extended forgiveness and mercy. He began to show me the Truth and how to walk in it.

In the most incredible act of love the world has ever known, my King paid the penalty of my defiance with His own blood. Regardless of my state of affairs in this world, how can I not say, “You have dealt well with Your servant?”

Had I not been brought so low, my heart would never have softened enough to allow Him access. It is truly good for me that I was afflicted, and now I know that a life lived according to His statutes is true freedom. Now, I endeavor to keep His word, not out of obligation or duty, but from love and the understanding that my Father knows what I can not. His law is my delight.

Even still, each time my King has allowed some hardship or infirmity to come into my life, it has always proved good for me. Sometimes affliction has uncovered some area of sin that I had blinded myself to, other times it has served to either strengthen my faith or to prove it against some trial.

I do not always enjoy these times of discipline or difficulty, but even in the most grievous of such times, I can now look back and see how each prior instance has led to growth, to a deepening of faith, to a more profound love for my God. I can remember that He always deals well with me.

In times when I feel hard-pressed, I remember that a grape or an olive is a good thing, yet only when they are crushed do they yield their most desirable products.  Neither olive oil nor wine are obtained without bruising the fruit. I do so want my life to be as a fine wine or a fragrant oil to my Lord.

Yes, He has dealt well with me, perhaps especially in allowing affliction.

Lord, teach me, teach us good judgement and knowledge, for we truly do believe in Your commandments. Let us not lose heart when difficulty comes but remember Your goodness and how well You have already dealt with us. May we learn from You and deal well with others, offering Godly counsel and encouragement to those who are going through afflictions now, amen. 

On Tents

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For while we are still in this tent, we groan, being burdened–not that we would be unclothed, but that we would be further clothed, so that what is mortal may be swallowed up by life.
2 Corinthians 5:4

Camping in Minnesota at the end of November is no joke. Before  you find yourself overly impressed by our cold tolerance, however, I should disclose that it wasn’t really all that cold (for Minnesota, that is — the low temps were still in the double digits), and that we were actually in a very warm and snug camper right in the back yard of some family members.

Still, midnight trips to the necessary through a breezy Minnesota November were less than fun. But there was family, laughter, and love, and there were mornings of quiet beauty as the sun rose scattering pink and gold splashes over the frost-covered fields.

And it did get me thinking…

For most of my life, camping has been a recreational activity enjoyed both when I was young and now with my own husband and children. We have typically camped in nice weather, though once or twice we have had the opportunity of finding out what the freezing point feels like in a tent. However, by and large our camping trips have been only for pleasure.

Except for one, that is.

In the weeks since our trip, I have been reflecting on the nuances of our bodies as tents — temporary dwellings in which we reside on the long journey towards our true home.  In that sense, this tent of mine is more akin to one of military use than the ones our family has used for enjoyment. After all, we who are in Christ are camping, as C. S. Lewis puts it, in “enemy-occupied territory.”

Living in tents behind enemy lines means that there will be times of hardship and difficulty. There will be unpleasantness, conflict, and lack of sleep. Comforts may be minimal or non-existent. At times we may even find ourselves alone or in the midst of enemy troops, far from the support of our fellow soldiers and friends.

At such times, we take comfort that this is not our home; that the tent we shelter within is just that: a tent. It is a temporary and portable shelter and it is not meant to be lived in forever.

For those of us who have been living in these tents for some four decades or more, we may occasionally be dismayed at the condition of our canvas. It may be creased with much use, weather-stained, patched, and may appear increasingly shabby.

No matter — we do our best to maintain it still. However, we can patch and scrub with some joy knowing that the time will come when we lay the tired, old things aside and take residence in our permanent home.

Still, despite the inevitable battles and skirmishes that rage around us while living in the enemy’s country, we can find enjoyment during our stay in these tents.  While we are here, we take a moment to savor the sunrise, to linger over the sight of a single butterfly or the sound of birdsong, to find quiet reminders of the Savior’s love amidst the tumult, to enjoy the company of those who are stationed with us at various points of our mission.

And always, always, we stand firm, enduring the hardship and giving thanks for the wonders of His grace, knowing that our time in this tent is ultimately short.  One day, perhaps sooner than we know, we will be called off the battlefields to our eternal home.  Then, O glorious future day! Then, we will be clothed with life!

Lord, teach us to be steadfast, believing and living in Your promises. Let us not grow weary of doing good; rather we ask that You will help us to persevere, walking faithfully in Your ways and living for Your purposes. Help us, then, to walk wisely during our sojourning here, making the best use of time because the days are evil. If we suffer, remind us that we are sharing in suffering as a good soldier of Christ. May we live and love in His name, amen. 

My Portion: Psalm 119:51-64

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Psalms 119:57-64

The LORD is my portion…

There is a rich word picture given in the first words of this week’s passage.  In his Treasury of David, Spurgeon points out that the first words of verse 57, “The Lord is my portion,” are only two words in the original Hebrew. He believes it is written almost as an exclamation of wonder: chêleq yehôvâh — My portion, Lord!  To have the Almighty as one’s own portion! Now that is something to shout about.

In the modern vernacular, the word “portion” often conjures up the thought of how much food a person ought to eat: smaller portion, super-size portions.  However, in the psalmist’s time,  portion referred either to one’s inheritance or to a person’s share of a meal, sacrifice, or the plunder from a victorious battle.

So then, to have the Lord as our portion is to have an eagerly awaited and wonderful share in the Glorious Presence.  Our share in the feast of the Bread of Life, our part of the sacrificial Lamb of God, our spoil from the victory of the battle against sin and death — if He is our portion, what a tremendous portion we have!

As we ponder what it means to have God as our portion, let’s briefly consider the remainder of the stanza. For my part, I need the subsequent reminder in verse 58 not to take my Portion for granted. I need to entreat His favor, not because He is reluctant to bestow it, but because I often forget that it is not mine by right but only by His graciousness and mercy.

Much of the content in the remaining verses in this passage may be looked upon as guidelines or indicators that the Lord is, indeed, our portion. The psalmist writes of examining his ways and turning his feet back into the path of God as well as prompt obedience to the Lord’s commands.

He also speaks of the cords of the wicked, indicating that he does not forget the Word in the midst of persecution. He keeps company with others who fear God, possibly due to the very human need for accountability. At the end of the stanza, he is the perpetual student, understanding that he will always need coaching in the Lord’s ways and praising the God whose love fills the whole world .

Good advice. May we all learn to follow such steps as the psalmist, taking care in our walk with God that we do not slip or stray.

So my friends, as we enter the season of Advent, I hope that the Lord is your portion, too. I hope that together we can think on our ways, turn our feet toward His testimonies, and encourage one another to keep His precepts.

This season, let’s not get caught up in the mayhem of greed nor forget that all the Christmas presents we give or receive are transitory. The true Gift of Christmas is Jesus, and what He gave was His life, given as a ransom in our place and paying in full the tremendous debt of sin we had against God.

That is our portion, our ultimate Christmas Present, and it will neither break nor fade nor be lost. Our salvation is secure in Christ forever.   Praise be to God on High!